From: Jeanne (The EnchantRASS)
Date: 28 Sep 1995

In article <Pine.A32.3.91.950927192618.110553A-100000@umabnet.ab.umd.edu>,
mcavagna@umabnet.ab.umd.edu says...
>
>
>> Perhaps it's time once again to recruit new memebers into the Anti
>> Ewok Association.  Our membership dropped somewhat over the summer.
>
>I think it's about time for you to break out that ol' membership form.

You are so right.

Welcome to the Ewok SPCA (Society for the Persecution of Cuddly
Atrocities)

To find out if this Society is the one for you, please feel free to take
the following test.  If you choose to join, you will receive nothing in
the mail, no one will ask you for donations, in fact there are many
people who will stop talking to you altogether.

1.  Does the scene of Artoo giving an Ewok a shock fill you with:
                  A  Shock and Horror
                  B   Indifference
                  C   Unbridled glee

2.  When you hear the term 'Ewok Steak' do you think of:
                 A   The stick an Ewok carries
                 B   The accessory that came with the little plastic guy
                 C   A-1 Sauce

3.  Does the warm fuzzy feeling you get when you think of Ewoks come
from:
                A   Each and every time you see one
                B   A feeling of nostalgia, you loved them when you were
                    six
                C   Your cozy Ewok lined boots

4.  Does the term 'Ewok Surprise' bring to mind:
                A   The scene when they come over the hill
                B   That Lucas ever thought they were a good idea in the
                    first place
                C   Dinner

5.  When you watch ROTJ, do you use the remote control to:
                A  Pause and rewind during every Ewok moment
                B  Adjust the volume
                C  Fast Forward every time one of the little $%^# comes
                   on screen

6.  When the Ewok gets killed do you:
                A  Burst into tears
                B  Think its a touching scene
                C  Cheer and order a round for the house

7.  When you hear the name 'Wicket' do you think of:
                A  The cutest little guy in the trilogy
                B  Croquet
                C  Dinner

8.   When you first heard Kenny Baker played an Ewok as well as Artoo,
did you:
               A  Feel he had reached legendary status
               B  File it away as interesting trivia
               C  Think he was slumming

9.   For you, is evidence of Ewoks intelligence found in:
              A  That they saved Solos butt
              B  Could build their own shelter
              C  Thought Threepio was a god.....I mean really!!!

10. When you think of Ewoks, are you filled with:
              A  Uncontrollable joy, the true heroes of the rebellion
              B  Nostalgia, they were so cute when you were six
              C  Disgust, utter loathing, but slightly hungry.


SCORING:  For every A, award yourself 0 points
          For every B, award yourself 5 points
          For every C, award yourself 10 points

0-40 point:  There is a strong chance this is not the organization for
you.  Besides, it's probably past your nap time

41-80 points:  Rest assured you are perfectly normal.  Enjoy the Trilogy

81-100 points:  You are a truly sick individual.  WELCOME!!!  Your sense
of humor is totally warped, you probably think Jeffrey Dahmer jokes are
funny, in short, you are our kind of people.  We welcome you with open
arms, especially since as sick as you are, no one else will speak to
you!