Author: Dark Lord Karno Dal
Date: 02/21/1998

1. Always, always carry extra kippers.
2. If you can't recruit someone to your side, park the Death Star on their
lawn.
3. Rag dolls often have foul mouths.
4. Never mention Rakelle.
5. Never plan a battle on Endor.
6. Always distrust your second in command.  He'll eventually turn on you.
7. Bert's chili doesn't just taste good, it can turn you into a dark jedi.
8. Never bring Trek into the story.
9. Beware Ewoks who have turned to the dark side.
10. Squirrels make good allies.
11. Never trust a celebrity, he's likely the main villain.
12. If you live in RASSM City, you'd better have good insurance.
13. Stupidity happens.
14. Beware sabaac games.
15. Not only did Boba Fett survive the Sarlac, he's really Kevin J.
Anderson.
16. Men with their own fan clubs are difficult to kill.
17. Stormtroopers in pink armor shoot even worse than the regular kind.
18. If you're trying to seduce Rimrunner, encasing her in Jello is a bad
idea.
19. The best way to solve a problem is to de-canonize it.
20. Peace? What's that?

Feel free to add to this.   :)
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Author: Robert Nolan

Ok, here goes....

21. The villain is never really dead.
22. Never ride around the galaxy in a purple Death Star.
23. Never mention Rakelle.
24. The best way to distract your enemy is to give him/her a force
wedgie.
25. Never mention Rakelle.
26. Never, ever, rely on obscure in-jokes.
27. Don't arrange a meeting of Sith Warriors at cloud Friggin' city,
they'll never show up.
28. Don't mention Rakelle.
29. Never remain in the area of an enemy's dead body. You'll regret
it.
30. Stay away from cluster f*cks, like The Battle of Halifax.
31. Always email a copy of your story to Watson.
32. Don't mention Rakelle.
33. Never stand under a ceiling beam as it's falling.
34. Never count on your comrade, even if he is a Jedi Master, to move
the ceiling beam before it hits you in the nose.
35. KILL MICROSOFT!!!!!
36. Never mention Rakelle.
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Author: Rakelle

ROTFL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
(I'm glad you finally got my point >:) )
Hmm, let's see if I can get my mind working again...

37. Kill Threepio on sight. (If you can't, make him self destruct.)
38. Never mention, or play, the Macarena.
39. Make sure you know the correct gender of the other participants
before you write anything.
40. Twilight side of the Force beats all.
41. Never clone anyone, especially Gates.
42. If the villain is Rakelle, she IS really dead.
43. If there's a cranky customer in the Waffle House, RUN.
44. No matter who you kill, someone, somewhere, will want revenge.
45. Beware of many Many's.
46. Beware of spinoff wars.
47. A good war never ends; a bad war never ever ends.
48. If boxy droids mysteriously appear on your ship, try not to notice.
49. Thou shalt not kidnap thy neighbor's squirrel.
50. Killing is good, painfully humiliating is vastly better >:)
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Author: James Watson

51. An Enterprise D in orbit, once put in motion, will remain in motion
until acted upon by Eric Bycer.
52. Never fight a land war in Halifax.
53. Evil can be Dark Dark, Dark Light, Light Dark or Twilight.
54. Saran Wrapping your enemies toilets is an effective tactical maneuver.
55. Never mention Rakelle.
56. Beware of Sith Warriors bearing drumsticks.
57. Given a battle of wits between a squirrel and a Sith Warrior named
Trory, bet on the rodent.
58. If you mistakenly mention Rakelle, refer to her as Rak since she's
going to kick your butt anyway.
59. Everybody owns a Death Star.
60. Continuity?  CONTINUITY?  We don't need no stinkin' continuity!
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