- "The Shaven Wookie will be with you, always."
--From an early draft of Star Wars
- "We should have brought Shaven Wookies to this deal."
--Samuel L. Jackson, from the rough draft of Pulp Fiction
- "I could've been a Shaven Wookie!"
--Marlon Brando, from an early draft of On The Water Front
- "My momma always said, Life is like a Shaven Wookie, you'll never know whatcha gonna
--Tom Hanks, from the first draft of Forrest Gump
- "Travelling through Hyperspace ain't like Shaving Wookies, kid."
--Harrison Ford's original lines in Star Wars
- "There's one, shave him."
--Stormtrooper, from an early draft of Star Wars
- "Set for for trim"
--A stormtrooper's original lines in Star Wars
- "You are part of the Rebel Alliance and a Wookie Shaver."
--Darth Vader to Princess Leia
- "Have you ever danced with a Shaven Wookie in the moonlight?"
--Jack Nicholson in Batman
- "As I walk through the valley where I Shave my Wookies, I look to my wife &
realize she's a wookie too."
--Weird Al Yankovic's "Shaven Wookie Paradise"
- Coming Soon: Luke Skywalker w/ Wookie Shaving action.
Failed Figure Idea, the testers shaved too many wookies, and people got scared.
- Imagine Letterman doing a "Top Ten List" on Shaven Wookies.
- "I will not Shave Wookies."
--Bart Simpson writing on the chalk board
- "You might be a redneck if... you Shave Wookies and date your sister."
--NOT one of Jeff Foxworthy's best jokes
- "Why do the call it Shaving a Wookie, it sounds X-rated, why don't they call it, Wookie Hair Removal?"
--NOT one of Jerry Seinfelds's best jokes
- "Do not pass go, do not collect 200 dollars, go directly to Shave a Wookie"
--Rare card found in old Monopoly Games
- Envision a bunch of Shaven Wookies playing Strip Poker.
- Envision a Shaven Wookie quoting Shakespere.
- Would they kick a Shaven Wookie out of Dennys?
- Do Shaven Wookies pay taxes?
- "I laughed, I cried."
--Manic Depressive Shaven Wookie, after being shaved.
- "There was once a shaven wookie from Nantucket..." --The rest is censored.
- "I love the smell of Shaven Wookies in the morning, it smells like victory"
--Marlon Brando, from the rough draft of Apocalypse Now
- "Shaven Wookies? We don't need no stink'n Shaven Wookies!!"
--From the first draft of Treasure of the Seirra Madre
- Bartender: How would you like your wookie?
James Bond: Shaven, not combed.
- "Like a wookie, shaving for the very first time"
--Madonna, Original lyrics to "Like A Virgin"
- "Mmmm..., Shaven Wookies" --Homer Simpson
- Envision the sink of a shaven wookie.
- Ah yes, the wookie is shaven, but is it washed?
- I'd just as soon shave a wookie!
- What would a wookie say if you shaved all their hair off and then made a life size statue out of it? Hmmmm....
- WOokie WOokie Cha Cha Cha!!! Wookie WOokie Cha!
WOokie WOokie Cha Cha Cha!!! WOokie WOokie Cha!
- Imagine how much Rogaine it would take for a shaven wookie to grow their hair back.
- Envision a shaven wookie in a beach volleyball tournament.
- Envision a shaven wookie addicted to prozac.
- Envision a shaven wookie in a dwarf tossing competition.
- "Shaven wookies are people! They're people!" --Charleton Heston, from the rough draft of Soilent Green
- If you thought it was hard to buy a Christmas present for a wookie when he already owns a comb, imagine trying to buy a present for a shaven wookie.
- In the outake reel to the original Star Wars film was found the immortal line, first muttered by Han Solo: "It's not wise to shave a wookie."
- Be careful of shaven wookies in nudist colonies, they get a little confused.
- Shaven wookies playing leapfrog? Or hopscotch?
- Shaven wookies: can't live with 'em...'cause they smell bad!
- Imagine a shaven wookie who loved you unconditionally?
- If a wookie shaves in the forest, and nobody is around, does it make a sound?
- Envision a shaven wookie as the Queen of England waving to her fans.
- How many shaves could a wookie get if a wookie could get shaved?
- I shaved a wookie once!
- Wookie, Wookie, where for art though wookie?
- Get that wookie out of your mouth! You don't know where it's been!
- The WOOOOOOOOOkie of the opera....
- Gentlemen, start your electric shavers
- Welcome to Wookie-asic Park
- Wookie-man! Wookie-man! Does whatever a wookie can!
- The emperor was really a (are you ready) a SHAVEN WOOKIE!!
- It was the best of wookies, it was the worst of wookies.
- If you really loved me, you would shave your wookie.
- A shaved wookie is a terrible thing to waste.
- How much aftershave does a wookie need?
- How often does a wookie need to shave?
- What does a shaven wookie do with his comb?
- What if a shaven wookie was your boss?
- What if a shaven wookie was your doctor?
- One day shaven wookies will rule the world!
- Trim not. Shave or shave not. There is no trim.
--Yoda, on Chewie's reluctance to become a shaven wookie
- He's getting to grow up eventually (200 years is fair enough) and I think we therefore should "Let the wookie shave." ANH
- Envision a shaven wookie along the shore in a "Baywatch" episode.
- Your stock in Bic razors would go up if all the wookies shaved.
- Shaven wookie in a bikini...RUN!!!
- The shaven wookie lives, he walks among us.
- Q: How much wookie could a shav'n wookie shave, if a shav'n wookie could shave wookie?
A: As much wookie as a shav'n wookie could shave if a shav'n wookie could shave wookies.
- Who's more shaven, the wookie, or the wookie who shaves him?
--Obi Jaun Kenobi (Obi-Wan's step-brother from the planet Tortellia. He was left out of the script to save time.)
- No one worries about shaving a droid.
- Imagine a shaven wookie shaving a wookie!
German Accent Mode = ON
- Vould you like to Shave my Vookie?
- Go on! Shave it! SHAVE MY WOOKIE!
- LIEBEN MEIN ABSCH WOOKIE!
- How many cans of Edge gel will it take to shave a wookie?
- Shave a wookie, what a test for electric razors!
- Envision a shaven wookie playing football for the Chicago Bears.
- Envision a shaven wookie sykdiving into a huge pit of Jello.
- Envision a shaven wookie on the cheerleading squad at the top of the pyramid.
- Envision a shaven wookie on the cheerleading squad doing splits.
- Envision a shaven wookie on the cheerleading squad doing a toe touch.
- Can't we all just shave a wookie?
- If you can't get into the bathroom, the wookie is shaving.
- If at first you don't succeed, let the shaven wookie try.
- Envision a shaven wookie piloting the Millenium Falcon.
- Envision Kashyyyk full of shaven wookies.
- Envision the Death Star's zoo of shaven wookies.
- There's no wrong way to shave a wookie.
- A shaven wookie with a comb is not an easy thing to live with.
- Oh I wish I had a shaven wookie, that is what I really want to be.
- What would you call a shaven wookie? Perhaps cold!
- Do not underestimate the stench of a shaven wookie.
- "You've failed your highness. I am a SHAVEN WOOKIE!"
--Chewbacca to the Rogaine man
- Envision a shaven wookie auto mechanic(checking under the hood, changing oil, etc.)
- I say forget shaving the wookie, lets throw hairspray on it and burn it.
- Can you imagine the burn the wookie would get after throwing aftershave on it's body.
- I like your shaven wookie page. Just remember, a wookie always gets his shave!
- Great balls of SHAVEN WOOKIES!
- I like my wookies shaven, not stirred.
- I like shaven wookies; they taste like chicken!
- Shaven wookies are the nudists of the 90s
- Quit shaving that wookie; you'll put an eye out!
- Is that MY wookie you're shaving?
- Imagine yourself with a shaven wookie now.
- Life is a wookie; enjoy the shaving.
- May the shaven wookie be with you.
- I'm a wookie your a wookie everybody shave the wookie.
- Imagine a million shaven wookies doing the polka.
- Remember, you can learn a lot from a shaven Wookie.
- What if your barber is a Shaven Wookie?
- "Obi-Wan never told you what happened to your Wookie."
"He told me enough. He told me you shaved him."
- "Now young wookie, you will shave."
- Shaves a Wookie better than a blade or your money back.
My apologies to Shakespeare for the following:
- In winter, there's nothing more befits a man than hair and fur, But when the winds of spring blow, then imitate the action of the Shaven Wookie.
- Alas, poor Chewie - I shaved him, Horatio - a Wookie of infinite fur.
- To shave or not to shave - that is the question. Whether 'tis better to brave the claws and blasters of outraged Wookies or to leave them furry.
- Shhhhhh......not while I'm shaving my wookie!
- A peach looks good
with lots of fuzz
wookie's no peach
and never wuz
Burma Wookie Shave
- Are you happy to see me...or is that a SHAVEN WOOKIE in your pocket?
James Bond voice mode on:
- "a Wookie, shaven...not stirred..."
- Got Shaven Wookie?
- Pardon me, do you have any Shaven Wookies?
- I can't believe it's not Shaven Wookie!
- Shaven Wookie in a can.
- "There will be a substantial award to the one who captures THE SHAVEN WOOKIE! I
want it alive,
there will be no disinfection!" --Darth Vader
- "I'd just as soon kiss a shaven wookie!" --Leia
- George Lucas' original script later edited for brevity:
"I shaved your wookie."
"Noooo! You didn't shave my wookie!"
- Okay...Shaven Wookie, naked except for black polyester socks and gucci loafers (leather
course) running the final stretch with the torch to the 2000 Summer Olympics...
- Envision a female shaven wookie.
- Envision a shaven wookie wearing a G-string.
- "I once was a shaven wookie!"
- If I try hard enough I can see a picture of a shaven wookie in my mind.
- "Is there a place these wookies go to get shaved?
--Obi-Wan as he sees a shaven wookie walking down the street.
- Why not shave an Ewok??
- Envision a group of shaven wookies doing the can-can. Scary!
- New Jingle: "All I want for Christmas is a shaven wookie, a shaven wookie..."
- "Luke, I am the father of the person who shaved your wookie."
- Shaven Wookies loitering around your house?
- Do shaven wookies eat out of garbage cans?
- Envision a shaven wookie wearing a kilt and playing the bagpipe.
- In the voice of the annoying girl in Charlie and the ChocolateFactory:
I want a shaven wookie! I want him now!
- Did you shave to make your wookie look taller?
- Life's a wookie, and then you shave one!
- I'm a Wookie,
He's a Wookie,
She's a Wookie,
We's a Wookie,
Wouldn't you like to be a Wookie, too?