From: gerthein@worldaccess.nl (G) Subject: An interview with Gonk Date: Sat, 23 Aug 1997 12:09:39 GMT "We now go live to our corresthpondent C-3PO in the Sthtar Warth Galacthy, where the enigmatic character known ath Gonk has decided to finally break hith thilence and give uth an excluthive interview. 3PO?" 3PO: Thank you, Mark. We're here Live at Tosche station, to talk to reverred droid, would-be God and walking trashcan, Gonk. Goodday, Mr. Gonk... GONK: Gonk. 3PO: Gonk it is, then. Let's cut to the chase, Gonk: you are worshipped by dozens as a God-like individual. Gonkdom is a religion, and wars have been fought over that religion. How do you feel about that? GONK: Gonk. 3PO: Interesting. That would be the most sane way to look at it, yes. I have nothing to add to that. Now, another controversy exists regarding your person: in Return of the Jedi, a powerdroid is being tortured at Jabba's Palace. There has been some fierce debating as to whether or not that was you. Even *I* am not one hundred percent sure, and I was there! So the question on everyone's mind is: was it you, or just another powerdroid? GONK: Gon... 3PO: Please, call me 3PO. GONK: Gonk. Gonk, Gonk Gonk. Gonk. 3PO: Indeed? Well, I'm glad that's cleared up. So, for my next qu.. GONK: Gonk Gonk. 3PO: With *hydrospanners*?! By the maker, what a sight that must have been! But I agree, that *is* a strange individual. Always has been, by the way. I'm affraid that's all the time we have, Gonk. Besides, the joke is running a bit thin I'm sure you'll agree.. So, Any final thoughts? GONK: Yes, thank you, 3PO: I would like to comment on this whole "Star WARS" phenomenon -- you see, to please the general public (I assume), there is always some hugely important war going on in this little... fictional galaxy, if you will: whether it's Jedi versus Clones, Rebels versus Empire -- there are always battles and fighting happening... Exciting battles, yes, but battles nonetheless; now, I'm not opposed to the idea of conflict "an sich" -- I feel that it may be one of the most important driving forces of self-improvement -- but the obsession with WAR that currently seems to exist in my society is something that -- I'll admit it -- does worry me more than a bit, and... what I'm trying to say is this: I'd personally like to see some "Star Peace" for a change; I apologize up front if that notion offends anyone -- although I really don't see how it could -- but that would be my humble opinion, and a thought that I would like to leave your viewers with, to.. well, to just think about, really, and to consider it as a genuine possibility... that would be all. 3PO: Sound advice, Gonk, and thank you for your time. Well, that's it from me, C-3PO Live at Tosche station. Back to you, Mark... - Gerthein (-o-) ----------------------- gerthein@worldaccess.nl -----------------------