From: bycer@blue.seas.upenn.edu (Eric J Bycer)
Subject: Re: RASSM Twat, The (was Re: RASSM Twats
Date: 8 May 1997 00:28:49 GMT

Rich Handley (CardSafe@unix.asb.com) wrote:

: <mock "God-status" mode on>
: Therefore.....  I'm going to make a bold move that might not meet with
: universal agreement, but such is life.  As the guy who started the
: whole Cool Person joke, I hereby disband the ORCP, for now and
: forever.  No one here is cool anymore.  We're all nerds.  There.  I've
: said it.  Now let's all go back to being the fun-loving, accepting,
: non-elitist types we once were.  Peace, love, and Jedi mind tricks,
: ya'll!
: </mock "God-status" mode off>

From the Book of Trials and Tribulations, Chapter V, verses 500-525 

  And Eric roseth to the volcano for the sacrifice that was do and did saith 
to Rich, "Who art as to thee, that thou mayest speak thusly?"  And the 
mock-Lord saith to the defiant one, "I am Rich, the one who rose thee out of 
the ether and didst bestow upon thy head the crown of coolness.  As is 
said in that other book, 'the Lord giveth and the Lord taketh away,' and 
now I am takething away."

   But Eric was not satisfied with the mock-Lord's logic, and cried out, 
"Why hast thou forsaken us?  For thy creations without humor?  For those 
that understand not thy community?  For those few you would steal my 
coolness?"
 
   And Rich stated simply, "Yes."

   Again Eric screamed, "Yay, though I have waited at Mount Yoda, and 
stood at the valley of the shadow of Trek, there didst thou not forsake 
me, and I feared no troll!  Now, at the behest of the outsiders and those 
that cannot take a joke, thou wouldst leaveth me to fend for myself?"

   Rich merely commented, "But thou didst not advertise thy coolness.  
Why dost thou protest this action, if thou didst not care?"  When Eric 
did not respond, Rich continued coldly, "Thou hast paid the price for 
thou lack of vision.  Cast thy crown into the molten rock, and get thy 
feet from off this most holy of holies!"
  
   Eric held his crown tightly in his hands and screamed, "Nay!  I will 
not bow to the trolls, the newbies, those without humor, and those who do 
not read thy most holy FAQ to understand!  I will not bow to those who 
have not the courage to ask 'For what is thy crown for?  What is an 
ORCP?'  I defy you to show me your power and recind thy order!"

   The mock-Lord raised his powerful arm and outstretched hand.  "I 
grow tired of asking thee, so this shall by thine last warning.  Giveth thy 
crown to me!"

   "Nay!"

   And the mock-Lord tore the crown from the defiant one's hands, and 
cast the crown into the lava below.  And a great plume of smoke arose 
from the volcano, and the ashes formed a pattern on the surface of the 
pool of molton rock.  And Eric cried out again, "Why?"  And Rich flew 
into a mighty rage and smote the defiant one with a great lightning bolt 
and cast the corpse into the crater as well.
  
   And the mock-Lord turned to the rest of the group waiting for their 
turn at the sacrifice, and simply said, "Next."

Eric Bycer
Didn't want your stupid title anyway...
616 'til 1,000!